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Long-distance study date: how to actually do one, with a plan for the evening

In lists of ideas for long-distance couples, the study date often gets a single line: «work side by side on a video call». This page covers the rest: what time, for how long, what you say and when, and how to wrap up before the call takes the whole evening.

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Set up your invite here

To pick days and times and share the link, you need to log in. Log in

The plan for one evening

An example with two 25-minute sessions, at 21:00 and 21:30. You pick the times; the pattern stays the same.

  1. Open the app.

    If the invite was taken, the session is already in both your calendars: you just join.

  2. Two minutes: what you'll do.

    One sentence each. «Finishing chapter four», «Answering work emails». That's enough.

  3. Quiet.

    Camera on, mic off if you like. You see each other working; you don't talk.

  4. Two minutes: how it went.

    One more sentence each: «done», «halfway», «nothing, rough night». Anything goes.

  5. Break.

    Stand up, get a drink. Five minutes, not half an hour.

  6. The second one, if you booked it.

    Same pattern: a sentence, the quiet, a sentence.

  7. Done.

    The rest of the evening is yours. If you want to talk, call each other the way you always do.

Three rules that hold the evening together

  1. A time written down, not «talk later».

    «Later» always moves. A booked time doesn't: it's in both your calendars, and it isn't renegotiated every night.

  2. An end.

    A call with no end eats the evening. Here the session closes on its own, at 25 or 50 minutes.

  3. Talk before and after, not during.

    Two minutes at the start and two at the end. In between, the quiet is the part you're there for.

How to set it up, in a minute

In the Invite section you pick the day and time, then «+ Another day» for the other evenings: say Tuesday and Thursday at 21:00. One link holds up to five dates. You send it in your chat, and on the other side one tap on «Take them all» is enough.

Every session taken lands in both your calendars in the app, and whoever takes it can also add it to the calendar they normally use, with a file. All the steps, with a message ready to send, are on the page about how to study with a friend online.

If you live in different time zones

Whoever invites picks the time in their own time zone; whoever gets the link sees the same sessions in theirs. There's nothing to convert by hand.

When you don't need it

If you already study well on a long call, keep it: a study date doesn't have to replace anything. This plan is for the evenings when you want a set time and an end, instead of a call that stays open for hours.

If one of you can't make it one evening, cancel that session from the calendar: the others stay.

Read next: Study with a friend online · The first two minutes of a session · Sessions with the mic muted

Frequently asked questions

What is a long-distance study date?

Two people studying or working, each on their own thing, at the same time, connected on a video call. People call it a study date even when it isn't romantic: it works for a couple as much as for two friends.

Can we talk during the session?

The session has two minutes for talking at the start and two at the end. In between you work quietly, and the mic can stay off.

How long is a session?

25 or 50 minutes. If you want more, book two times back to back, say 21:00 and 21:30.

Are the calls recorded?

No. WeFocusBuddy doesn't record audio or video: on our server, recording doesn't exist. And recording the call is prohibited by the Terms.

Do we both need an account?

Yes, a free one, adults only: you sign in with your email and a code, no password, or with a quick sign-in.

We're in different time zones: does it work?

Yes. Each of you sees the sessions in your own local time.

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